Words from Katie...

"The truth is, I saw myself in those little faces.  I looked at them and felt this love that was unimaginable and knew that this is the way God sees me.  The children would run to me with gifts of stones or dirt and I saw myself, filthy and broken, offering my life to the God of the universe and begging Him to make me into something beautiful.  I sit here in a broken world, small and dirty at His feet, and He who sits so high chooses to commune with me, to love me anyway.  He blinds himself to my sin and filth so that He can forge a relationship with me.  And this is what he did for me with these precious children.  He blinded me to the filth and disease, and I saw only children hungry for love that I was eager to share with them.  I adored them, not because of who I was, but because of who He is.  I just sat right down on that cold, hard floor and snuggled my nose into their dirty necks and kissed their fungus-covered heads and didn't even see it.  I was in love."

I'm all confused

I cannot, for the life of me, figure out why everyone's picture is displayed on their blogs except for mine, even though all of my settings seem right.  I probably spent an hour today trying to figure it out to no avail, so I finally just posted a picture and put my name above it.  I really am all confused. :\

My Day...

This morning I stayed in bed a little too long and was awakened by a phone call from my sister.  We had a nice chat, and I needed to get up anyway.  It was already 8:45am and I needed to wake Michael up and take him to the DMV to register his car.  Of course nothing ever goes smoothly when you go to the DMV.  We were asked if the car was insured.  I was sure it was since my husband wouldn't send me to register it if it wasn't.  I called Dave who assured me that it was and to call our insurance company to have them fax over the information.  Fortunately it didn't turn out to be too much of a pain, and surprisingly the DMV wasn't crowded...that was a 1st!  On the way home we picked up a couple of job applications for Michael.  He will be starting at a local community college in 2 weeks and needs to work part time.  Steven just took a job at our local McDonald's and I am very happy that he won't be sitting around the house wondering what to do with himself in the fall. :)  Maybe next spring we will pay for him to take an electrical course.  He has shown an interest, but we really wanted him to get a job too.  At around 1:30 I went to pick my mom up for our biweekly trip to Newark, NY to visit my brother, Tim.  He is always happy to see us and today was no different.  After shaking another residents hand and answering his question, "Do you have a cat?", we started on our way to the car for a drive and a snack.  We were about 15 minutes into our hour long visit when it got dark and started to pour.  It rained so hard that I could barely see out the windshield.  I could tell that Tim was a little stressed since he was sitting up a little straighter and was looking out the windows differently than usual.  When it thundered I saw him flinch slightly.  Then it started, the hand clapping and the noise that he makes when he's mad...or feeling stressed.  I tried to calm him by telling him that I loved a good downpour, and it adds a little more interest to our car ride...lol!  But, I couldn't sway him.  I got him a Frosty from Wendys and took him back to his house (not early, but when our visit was finished) but when we got out of the car in the rain (it was only raining lightly now), he clearly wasn't happy.  Mom and I kissed and hugged him goodbye in the rain.  As I held his hand as we walked down the sidewalk, he complained (in his own way) about the rain,  I responded back to him that it was "just a little rain and we're not going to melt."  We stepped through the front door into the kitchen of his home and he let go of my hand, took a few steps, and started crying and whacked himself a few times.  I am really desiring a communicator more and more so that he can tell me what he's thinking and why he acts the way he does sometimes.  I also want to know when I annoy him or if he likes it when I touch the back of his head and run my fingers through his hair, rub his arm, touch his hand, or if he'd rather not be touched.  I notice my mother talking to him less and less (she talks to everyone less) and I wonder what he thinks of that too.  Does he notice that we're losing her more and more?  I found myself slightly teary when I left him, and then shortly after we turned onto the street my
mother commented, "Well, we got that over with for another couple weeks!" It sounds to me like she's glad to not have to go back there for 2 weeks. :(  I can't even explain my feelings about him and her and our visit...overwhelming? sad? confusing?

Hugs and a kiss from Dave greeted me when I returned home.  That always makes things feel a little bit better. Dinner was good, spaghetti and meatballs and zucchini squash from Martha.  I mixed mine right in with my spaghetti this time, which my dear husband told me was weird, but I didn't think so.  It looked like fancied up healthy spaghetti to me and it was delicious.  I even found a picture just now, so someone else is "weird" like me too. :)
Today I noticed a touch of color to some of the trees already and the days are getting shorter.  Could summer be ending soon?  I wish it didn't go by so fast.

Newsboys - Live With Abandon (Lyric)

From our visit today. :)  Mom will never let Tim get away without her giving him a kiss and a hug.  He's a hug and kiss collector, he rarely gives them, although he gave the sweetest most tender hugs for a few months after our dad died.  We had a nice visit.

Still

Remembering Carefree Days...

Remember the carefree days of childhood?  Me too.  Sometimes I wish I was still a little girl and didn't have to make any big girl decisions.  Life was much less stressful when I was younger, even just a few short years ago when my boys were toddlers and I didn't know that one of them had a learning disability that would cause him to struggle all through his years of schooling and beyond.  All of us want the very best for our kids, and this isn't what I would have chosen, but God doesn't make any mistakes and He has a purpose and a plan for each one of us.  My son has been struggling lately.  It's difficult to understand, very hard to watch, and I feel just plain helpless.  It's a good thing we know Jesus because He knows and understands all things, and this makes us all the more dependent on Him.  I hope my boy is soon back to normal.  These days it seems like there is one tough decision after another, not just concerning him and his needs, but other things as well.

We're in trouble...

This is our President, scary.

Obama Phone

I'm sure that you have all seen this video by now.  Obama is trying to win the state of Ohio by giving away cell phones to the poor on the taxpayers dime, in order to win their votes.  The 1st video made me angry, but the second video someone made, made me laugh!

Words of Wisdom

If one’s not praying regularly, it’s only because something else is regularly loved more than God. -Ann Voscamp


The point is a house pinned together with sacrifice and Christ and love that can withstand any winds. -Ann Voscamp


Unplug often to get refreshed. You’ll see your true self when you look for your reflection in the eyes of souls not the glare of screens, -Ann Voscamp


 Only speak words that make souls stronger. -Ann Voscamp

Good to be Alive

This song really hit me on the way home from small group tonight.  How often I take my life and each day that I have been given, for granted.  Every day that I have is a gift from God, and I am to honor and serve him.  There is NO time to waste and yet I waste so much. :(

"I'm Not a Baby!"

It was a gorgeous and busy day today. I woke my mom up early this morning so that we could go to the 8:15am service at church because I knew the 9:30am one would be way overcrowded. It was a really nice Easter service, great worship and message. Upon arriving back home I helped Mom change into some more comfortable clothes...she has a broken right wrist you know, which reminds me, last night we had Beef Burgundy for dinner. It's beef, onions, mushrooms, and carrots in a beef sauce with red wine in it, served over noodles. Anyway, you know how hard it is to pick up noodles sometimes? Well, try doing it with your less dominant hand. My mom couldn't eat hers too fast so I offered to help, picking up her spoon so that I could get more and putting it up to her mouth. She quickly said, "No, I'm not a baby!" We all got a good laugh, especially the boys. Somehow she managed just fine. :)

A night out with the boys

Last night Dave went to a friend's house to watch the basketball games, but the guy's wife (who I am friends with) was in Florida, so I stayed home. I decided that the boys and I would see the movie "Hugo" in 3D. I have seen the movie, but the boys hadn't and I knew they would love it. It turned out to be a fun night out. I sure wish they made more movies like this one, it's very entertaining without all the unnecessary dirt that's usually in movies these days. We all enjoyed it so much, even Steven, and he's hard to please when it comes to movies.

Pedicure

Okay, so I didn't have a complete pedicure, no soaking and sanding of the dead winter skin, and my skin does look rather thirsty, but I did repolish my toenails! Did you notice that my sister Martha and I have the same pinky toes? ;-)

Pedicure party at Betsy's place!

Fear of the Unknown

Several years ago, I got video footage of my then almost 3 year old child laying on the floor crying and yelling, "I don't want to be a big boy!" He was upset with me for putting training pants on him and insisted that he didn't want to "go poopy in the potty". Fast forward 14 yrs to last night. We had a talk with him about getting a job, he will be 17 in April ya know, and he seems to show no interest in filling out any job applications. He got very upset with us for putting the pressure on, and although he didn't lay on the floor and scream, he did punch a couch pillow a few times. He is afraid, but I'm not sure what he is afraid of...failure? He has always been a perfectionist, so much so that he dropped his AP Literature class this year after staying up until the wee hours of the morning several times to perfect his writings about the literature he had read. He was complimented by the teacher on his writing, but his other classes were suffering. Toward the end of our conversation with our son last night, he brought up the video taped incident and its similarity to last night's incident. He laughed a little bit that here he was, doing the same thing many years later. I'm glad he realized the silliness of it. Anyway, he will be filling out some job applications very soon, and I think he will find that working isn't so bad after all. :)

I am Loved Much...

This morning I am wondering why. Why do I forget to count my blessings? Why do I take for granted these blessings all around me from God? Why do I do this? I am so loved, yet I often choose to look right past it all. Please help me, Lord. Help me to remember to see your blessings everywhere in my every day. Thank you for loving me.

Happy Birthday, Steven!

God blessed me tremendously when he gave me this handsome boy 18 years ago. Happy Birthday, Steven! Thanks for being silly with me. I love you!

Sick Pup

Something is wrong with Koty. He had to sleep in his crate last night (which he hasn't done in a couple of years) because he pooped on the kitchen floor the previous 2 nights. At leat he didn't poop on the carpet, so the cleanup was pretty easy, but still... This morning there is a little bit of something in the crate, not quite sure what it is. While the kids were having breakfast, he started heaving and was put outside to vomit. Poor thing, I feel bad for him and I wonder what to do. :(

Brrrr!!!

Winter has finally arrived in our area. The morning commute to work wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it was going to be after hearing the weatherman's predictions last night. I have snow tires on my car, thanks to my wonderful husband, but I don't think it was very slippery this morning, although it sure is cold! Right now the thermometer reads 7 degrees, brrr! Today I am thankful for a nice hot meal and a warm house....and snow tires!

Happy New Year!!

Happy New Year! Looking forward to 2012. I have a wonderful new job (well, I've been there for almost 10 months, is that still new?), Steven is a Senior, and Michael is a Junior. Dave's job of about 16 yrs remains stable and so...this year, after 3 years of being begged by Dave's dad to go on a trip out west with them, we are finally going in July...I think. Nothing is official until plane tickets are purchased, so we'll see. Steven is taking driver's ed and will hopefully take his road test pretty soon. He just took an online test to see where his strengths are as far as a job is concerned. He isn't really sure what he wants to do yet, but maybe the test will help him a little bit. I am hoping to grow more in my walk with Christ, and to be more disciplined about my daily Bible reading and study. Michael and I are planning to read through the Bible, along with many people at our church. I lost a friend to stomach cancer in December, and her walk with Christ was amazing. She left behind such a wonderful legacy for her children (as did my own dad). I often feel like I am selfish with my time, and basically don't feel like this is all God has for me or desires of me, so I am praying that I am willing to trust God 100% with this wonderful life he has given me, and that I allow him to use me in any way that he desires to grow his kingdom. Please pray for me.

"If you count each "Fear not" in the scriptures, there are apparently 366, one for every day of the year. That means even on a leap year you have to have enough faith to jump into His arms — every day.” - The Farmer Voscamp