Thursday, August 22, 2013

My Day...

This morning I stayed in bed a little too long and was awakened by a phone call from my sister.  We had a nice chat, and I needed to get up anyway.  It was already 8:45am and I needed to wake Michael up and take him to the DMV to register his car.  Of course nothing ever goes smoothly when you go to the DMV.  We were asked if the car was insured.  I was sure it was since my husband wouldn't send me to register it if it wasn't.  I called Dave who assured me that it was and to call our insurance company to have them fax over the information.  Fortunately it didn't turn out to be too much of a pain, and surprisingly the DMV wasn't crowded...that was a 1st!  On the way home we picked up a couple of job applications for Michael.  He will be starting at a local community college in 2 weeks and needs to work part time.  Steven just took a job at our local McDonald's and I am very happy that he won't be sitting around the house wondering what to do with himself in the fall. :)  Maybe next spring we will pay for him to take an electrical course.  He has shown an interest, but we really wanted him to get a job too.  At around 1:30 I went to pick my mom up for our biweekly trip to Newark, NY to visit my brother, Tim.  He is always happy to see us and today was no different.  After shaking another residents hand and answering his question, "Do you have a cat?", we started on our way to the car for a drive and a snack.  We were about 15 minutes into our hour long visit when it got dark and started to pour.  It rained so hard that I could barely see out the windshield.  I could tell that Tim was a little stressed since he was sitting up a little straighter and was looking out the windows differently than usual.  When it thundered I saw him flinch slightly.  Then it started, the hand clapping and the noise that he makes when he's mad...or feeling stressed.  I tried to calm him by telling him that I loved a good downpour, and it adds a little more interest to our car!  But, I couldn't sway him.  I got him a Frosty from Wendys and took him back to his house (not early, but when our visit was finished) but when we got out of the car in the rain (it was only raining lightly now), he clearly wasn't happy.  Mom and I kissed and hugged him goodbye in the rain.  As I held his hand as we walked down the sidewalk, he complained (in his own way) about the rain,  I responded back to him that it was "just a little rain and we're not going to melt."  We stepped through the front door into the kitchen of his home and he let go of my hand, took a few steps, and started crying and whacked himself a few times.  I am really desiring a communicator more and more so that he can tell me what he's thinking and why he acts the way he does sometimes.  I also want to know when I annoy him or if he likes it when I touch the back of his head and run my fingers through his hair, rub his arm, touch his hand, or if he'd rather not be touched.  I notice my mother talking to him less and less (she talks to everyone less) and I wonder what he thinks of that too.  Does he notice that we're losing her more and more?  I found myself slightly teary when I left him, and then shortly after we turned onto the street my
mother commented, "Well, we got that over with for another couple weeks!" It sounds to me like she's glad to not have to go back there for 2 weeks. :(  I can't even explain my feelings about him and her and our visit...overwhelming? sad? confusing?
Hugs and a kiss from Dave greeted me when I returned home.  That always makes things feel a little bit better. Dinner was good, spaghetti and meatballs and zucchini squash from Martha.  I mixed mine right in with my spaghetti this time, which my dear husband told me was weird, but I didn't think so.  It looked like fancied up healthy spaghetti to me and it was delicious.  I even found a picture just now, so someone else is "weird" like me too. :)
Today I noticed a touch of color to some of the trees already and the days are getting shorter.  Could summer be ending soon?  I wish it didn't go by so fast.


Martha said...

Mom appears glad to get most outings over with lately. She would just as soon sit in her chair or at her table than go out. It leaves me confused too.

I wonder if the noise of the rain and thunder are bothersome to Tim, or if it overstimulates him in some other way. Little Cat doesn't like it either, but she darted out the door and into the rain when I turned the vacuum cleaner on this afternoon.

So glad Dave was there to wrap his arms around you when you returned home. Sometimes loving arms are the best therapy.

Priscilla said...

That sounds like a tough visit. I totally feel overwhelmed when he does that.

Tell Dave that Wegmans cafe adds all sorts of veggies and stuff to their pasta skillets. Sometimes even eggplant.

Priscilla said...

I should have gone on the visit with you. I wasn't doing anything. I'm sorry.
In 2 weeks it will be too late. Webster schools will be in session and I will be the librarian.

Heather said...

Oh, that sounds like such a hard visit:-( You handled it so well, though!

kristina said...

That sounds like an emotionally tough day. You seem to handle it all well considering you are dealing with people who can't communicate very well. I am glad you sisters all support each other.